How to prep your toddler for potty training
Originally published March, 2009
By Lisa Bendall
Illustration by Lillian Chan
When it comes to teaching your toddler to tinkle where you want her to, there’s a whole toilet-tank-full of methods out there. And as your little one develops, the potty training process starts to loom larger than life. But it actually begins much earlier than you may realize. Here are five tips on how parents can lay the groundwork now for a successful transition out of diapers later.
Months before your little one is ready to park herself on the potty, she’s probably following you into the bathroom. Offer her a running commentary, teaching her what typically happens in a bathroom. Decide on the vocabulary you’ll use (“poop” or “ca-ca”?). Talk about the basic concepts of wet and dry (“Your hair is wet,” “Feel your diaper—it’s dry,”) and describe aloud what’s going on in your child’s own body. Devyn Flesher of Burnaby, B.C., does this with daughter Indiana, now almost two. “Even when she was an infant, I’ve vocalized, ‘Are you pooping?’ ‘Did you pee?’” she says. You can also help your toddler understand what a toilet is for by putting the poop from his diaper into it and flushing it, just like Hilary Beasley from Toronto did with her son Keaton, now 3. “He liked flushing so much I was worried he would start finding things in the house to flush, but luckily that didn’t happen!”
Since you’re an unwitting role model for your little one in the loo, be aware of your approach to elimination, suggests Christina Rinaldi, a child development expert at the University of Alberta in Edmonton. Do you behave as though these bodily functions are natural or embarrassing? If you’re not comfortable having a poo-poo powwow, enlist the help of picture books and DVDs geared to potty training, especially those with familiar kids’ characters, to help you broach the topic with your tot.
Take your toddler on a shopping expedition early, advises Mary Ann Avey, an early childhood and parent educator at Childreach in London, Ont. “If you choose a potty long before they’re actually ready, they can get used to seeing it in the bathroom.” Flesher’s daughter is just now starting to sit on her potty. “I also make sure her cloth diaper is a bit loose so that if she’s inclined to sit on the potty, she can pull the diaper down quickly.”
An important part of potty prep work is taking stock of your child. Some are slow to adapt to new experiences. Others aim to please. There are also physical differences between kids: Some are regular as trains, while many have unpredictable body rhythms. These are key factors to consider when you’re deliberating between training methods such as schedules or stickers. And pay attention to hints you should back off, says Avey, like resisting sitting on the toilet or crying—some toddlers may not be developmentally equipped for the experience. “If things like flushing the toilet bother the child, then it might be an indication that the child has a fear or anxiety that may interfere with toilet training,” explains Avey.
Even if all signs point to your child being primed to start toilet training, don’t fret if it doesn’t happen immediately. Children have their own timetables, and even very young kids can pick up on their parents’ angst when things don’t go as planned. Flesher says she’s remaining laid back about the potty-training path ahead. “I’m not in any rush,” she says. “I don’t know many five-year-olds who don’t know how to use the toilet.”
Toronto-based freelance writer Lisa Bendall is thankful her daughter took to the potty easily.
Ready to start potty training your toddler? Find out our great tips to help get you started.