My kids couldn’t be more different when it comes to sharing their problems.
My 10 year old happily shares most of his issues with us at any opportunity.
My little seven year old, however, is a different matter. She tends to keep her troubles to herself. It’s something we’re working on.
Every kid is different, of course, but if you have a kid who’s naturally more reserved, we’ve found a few techniques that have helped us get her to open up more.
It’s an ongoing process, but what’s working is creating a quiet time for her to share.
At night, I’ll lie beside her as she drifts off to sleep. It’s amazing what she’ll tell me when she feels secure in her bed at night!
The trick with this is to avoid questions that let her give a yes or no answer, like “Did you have a good day?“. I find if I ask a question like “tell me something that happened at school today“, then she’ll share more.
We’ve also learned not to pressure her to share. It’s tempting to push to get her to open up, but quite often she’ll just shut down if she feels pressured.
The trick is to find a show that they enjoy, and then use an episode as a springboard to talk to your child.
We just watched an episode of The Adventures of Puss in Boots (one of our kids’ best loved shows). In Season 1, Episode 13, Dulcina tries to use a wishing star to help her friends, and fails miserably. It turns out that she’s always been a help to her friends all along.
For your little kids:
For your big kids:
For your teens:
While I’ve worked for the Osborne Group for over 10...