Did you have a birth plan? Did that delivery actually go according to plan? Does any birth actually happen the way parents imagine it might?

Here at Canadian Family, we’re giggling over this tongue-in-cheek piece from the folks at McSweeney’s.

“Jamie and Jeff’s Birth Plan” is an uber-detailed list of delivery room dos and don’ts from the most irritating fictional parents ever. The plan takes a swipe at popular parenting theories (vaccinations, circumcision and bottle feeding receive a poke), and includes guest appearances from Benjamin Bratt, Gwyneth Paltrow and Zooey Deschanel. (Really, what good birth plan doesn’t?)

For the record, I had a loose plan, but neither of my kids followed the directions, which is why my fave line is: “In the event of a Cesarean, please practice Western medicine.” Perhaps I should have ordered up Benjamin Bratt?

It really is good to have a plan, though, even if just to ditch it in the heat of delivery. Check out these great tips on drafting your own birth plan.

Go, read, laugh, share. And tell us about your birth plan. Did it help, or did you pitch it out the window at the first contraction?