Is your teen constantly moping about not having a cellphone, laying it on thick with the everybody-else-has-one sob stories? Wendy Wright’s 16-year-old daughter, Colette, campaigned for a cellphone for two years before the Toronto mom finally gave in. Today, she reluctantly admits the phone has actually been good for both of them. “[Getting] it coincided with her first year of high school. Now that she’s going out more, she can call me and say that she’s running late or ask which streetcar to get on. I know she can haul it out and call 911 in a flash, too,” says Wright, who – like many parents of cellphone-sporting teens – finds the extra security a comfort.

If you decide your teen is ready for a cellphone (and that letting her have one might not be such a bad thing), you’ll need to set a few rules to keep the peace and your good credit rating. Here are a few to consider.

Dial responsibly
A survey of 1,000 North American cellphone-owning teens showed that 71 per cent enjoy completely unrestricted use of their phones, calling whomever they want, whenever they want.

That’s not always a good thing, says Dr. Liza Weiser, a psychologist in Thornhill, Ont. “When there’s a problem, many teens often act on impulse. They say, ‘Well, I’m going to call you and tell you what I think right now,’ instead of sleeping on it,” says Dr. Weiser. If your daughter is constantly in the middle of an alpha-girl drama with her friends, or your son is threatening to dial Children’s Aid each time you ask him to clear a plate, you can always take the phone away.

There’s also another option – cellphone plans that allow parents to block incoming/outgoing calls of specific numbers and limit their teen’s calls to certain times of the day. While these plans are currently available only in some parts of Canada, the Firefly phone from Rogers Wireless – which allows kids to dial only a few preprogrammed, parent-approved numbers and rejects calls from numbers not in the phone’s directory – is available in most parts of the country.

Obey school rules
Many schools have strict rules for cellphone use, so find out your school’s policy and ensure that your teen abides by it. At Vancouver’s Britannia Secondary School, students can carry cellphones with them, but they must be turned off during class time. Principal Randy Clark says just about all students comply, and when they don’t, the teacher can confiscate the phone until after class.

Cough up for costs
Beverley Cathcart-Ross’s daughter, Gillian, ran up $140 on her first cellphone bill. The parent educator and Toronto mom of four had already established that she’d pay half of a 100-hour, $40- per-month plan, while her daughter was expected to pay the other half. Gillian had to pay off the balance with earnings from her part-time job.
Wright buys a $10 phone card for Colette every month. When she runs out, she waits ’til the next month.

Ringers off at dinnertime
Dinnertime is often the only opportunity busy families have for conversation. To keep that sacred, make your dinner table a phone-free zone.

State your destination
You bought the phone so you wouldn’t be left wondering if he’s lying in a ditch when he’s late getting home, and now he’s tossing you a flippant “Just call my cell” when you ask where he’s going? You’ve every right to be miffed. After all, it’s a phone, not a Global Positioning System, right? “You can say, ‘I don’t like it when you say you can get in touch with me, so I don’t need to know where you are,” points out Dr. Weiser. If that doesn’t do it, set out some consequences, she says. Negotiate a solution or take away the phone.